He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
he shaved USA in his pubs
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
