Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Randomize
