i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
