some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize