Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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