I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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