capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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