that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Randomize
