Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
We were destined to go to rehab together
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
false alarm, still single
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