I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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