I am in a vortex of obligation.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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