I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Randomize
