Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
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She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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