Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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