Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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