He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
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