At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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