i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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