I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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