lets start a swedish sibling band together
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
