I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
home. puking in laundry basket.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
