What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Damn victory sex feels great
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
