I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
