I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize