I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
