Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize