Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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