This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
