So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
