Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
