What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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