dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize