I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
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