we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
