They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I will be naked everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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