Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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