Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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