what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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