When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
