Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
