I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Drake has all the answers
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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