Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
