Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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