Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I want a musical about memes.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
