Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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