Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Randomize