Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
