she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
