apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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