He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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