You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
