Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
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